Had a reply from Wiccaweys - to phone for advice or rehoming - I tried a couple of times but they were busy.  I phoned my agility trainer to say that I won't be there tomorrow and to warn the others they have possibly been in contact with kennel cough last week. I also told him how concerned I was about Meg snapping - well biting!  He is still prepared to take her on so it is not all doom and gloom there.  Then I managed to get hold of the recommended trainer for some one to one.  She was very positive - and quite used to collies!  If I am prepared to put in the work she thinks that there is hope.  I can't imagine what it would be like to be dogless now.  Anyway can't do anything until she is healthy again.  I should not have left it so long.  But you know what it is like - when things go along nicely then one loses the motivation to act. 

Hi, just been reading your blog.    Good to know you'll be able to get some one to one   Try to get your OH to go too, from what you've written he needs as much work as the dog

It's taken me 28 years to get OH almost trained with the dogs he's fairly reliable now but does have lapses LOL

Thanks Dill - it was the lady you told me about - she was also recommended by my agility trainer's wife.  She told me I should have sorted it out 3 years ago when I had Meg as a pup!  But she says it is not too late now.  My husband doesn't want to talk about it right now - he is feeling pretty bad about the dog.  I think that he would like the problem to go away completely and the easiest thing is to get rid of the dog. He won't say that though.  However he has always preached to me that the easy way out is not always the best and nothing is achieved without some hard work.  Soooo will he practise what he preaches?!

LOL 

As they say, it's easy to look back and say "should have done this or that"   all you can do now is move forwards

In my experience it's a whole lot easier if you're ALL playing by the same rules   I know how hard it was when my oldest child was growing up and OH was really indulgent - I was the NO person and had to be disciplined with her while OH just undermined everything   He's seen the results of that, now with our second he's the opposite - comes down far too hard on a child that really doesn't need it   - probably would get it right on a third, but we're NOT going there LOL

The hardest bit is getting him to admit he's partly to blame and will have to join in with the re-training (OK We know he's going to have to be retrained too, but probably best not to tell him that )   Hopefully he'll listen to the trainer more than he does you

Wishing you good luck with this
Paula

I so know what you mean.  It was the opposite with us - OH came down heavily on first - the night she flounced out at age 14 after I asked her to stay in - he wanted to put her belongings out on the doorstep.  I refused to go along with it.   Everything that happened after that was my fault. (nothing really happened except that I worried)  So thankful now that our daughter is really well grounded, a good mother to her two and a good friend - even though she turns up on the doorstep without invitation.  I have to drop everything to see to my grandchildren - but it puts into perspective what is important.  Luckily both my daughter and 'daughter-not-in-law (?!?) agree that I should persevere with the dog and not get rid of her.  The trainer is not a behavourist I have pointed out to my OH who now thinks that behavourists are not worth the money spent after our past experience (won't go there)  Hope she makes the right impression when she comes.  She is last chance saloon I am afraid. 

Keeping everything crossed for you.