my beautiful rottweiler bitch died on 21st feb 2002,and i just cannot seem to get over her death.She just 2 months short of her tenth birthday and had got mammary cancer back for the third time so on my vets advice i decided that i did not want to have her cut open again.I will never forget driving home with tears streaming down my face and her looking at me in the rear view mirror with those"whats the matter mum" eyes.Her euthanasia was terrible,she took far to long to die,and kept gasping for breath for at least 2 minutes and her eyes told me that she was frightened.I do now believe that the dose of anesthetic was too small and that is why it took so long.I drove home with her on my back seat not only thinking that i had killed my best friend,but that i had made her suffer.She is laid to rest in our orchard under her favourite tree.The vet denies any wrong doing,but after 2nd opinions it seems he got it wrong!! Time is meant to be a great healer but the guilt kills me and i do hope that someday i will see her again to hold her in my arms and tell her sorry.I loved her so much.

Kane,

You did what you had to do to help Kassy. You did the right thing, she knows that. We've recently had to have our beloved dog put to sleep and I know how hard and painful it is. I kept asking myself questions like could we have done more. At the end of the day, we are human and as such we fel guilt. You should not feel guilty, if you'd let her go on and suffer that wouldn't have been fair. Kane, you did the right thing, she is happy and pain free now, she knows how much you loved her and I'm sure she wouldn't want you to be feeling sad.
Have you tried pet bereavement counselling. It might sound daft but why not write her a letter an say what you want to say, tie it to a helium balloon and let it go. Sometimes writing it all down helps to relieve a little of the grief.

Take Care,
xx

thankyou for your kind words.I got her photo album out tonight and watched our video of her.I have just cried like a baby,but i have let a bit of steam off and feel a little better.I will go to her grave tomorrow and plant some spring bulbs.My problem is i cannot get out the image of her dying and its haunting me.Y es she loved me dearly and i loved her and i know i did what was best i am sure.But,good news i have a neopolitan mastiff and another rottie now so my hands are full. But she will never ever be replaced,she was unique.My babe. thanks again take care xxxx

Hi, there is no need for you to feel any guilt, you done what we all have to do at some time we all feel the same i lost my Bullmastiff boy on the first of may this year and it hurts i still cry but that is because i miss him so much he was only 7 years old but when that day arrived he walked in to see the vet one that he always saw sat in front of me so i could hug him wagged his tail to say hi to the vet and nurse and then gave his paw to the vet gave his mum a kiss and he was gone,.i know we gave that boy and all the others we have had over the years the very best home they could have none of them were ever hurt/hit or treated badly at any time all they had was love.

Hi Kane, I'm sorry to hear about Kassy. Don't feel bad about what has happened. It's never easy to make a decision to let them go and unfortunately when unforseen things happen it makes it twice as hard to try and remember them how they were in life and not like they were in their final moments. I know exactly how you feel, I lost my beautiful 6 year old Dobermann bitch - Storm, in october last year, she ran right onto a fallen branch that had blown down during the night. It snapped off inside her, smashing two ribs, puncturing her lungs in 3 places, tearing her diaphram and finally penetrating through to her stomach caviaty. By the time I'd got to her she was, unbelievably, still standing, I had to run back and get my car whilst my husband stayed with her. I took her to the vets who operated on her for ages, but in the end it was best to stop and let her go. I still remember the look of shock and disbelielf in her eyes as I was driving her the short journey to the nearest vets. But what can you do? - Nothing, we've done our best for them, gave them a wonderful life, helped them when they are sick, a few brief moments that are completely out of our control will not take away what we had with them. I have since had 2 more additions to the household - 4 dogs in total, but even now if I think too much about that day I feel it could have happened yesterday.
Best wishes
Clair

i understand how much losing an animal hurts i work in a vet and see it all the time but it especially hurts when its one of your own i lost my great dane duke at 12 of severe arthiritis in his back legs and my best friend toby at 12 who was a st bernard it hurts but think of all the happy moments it really works

robert

bless all of you for your kind comments,i shall look forward and think of all the happy times!!

Kane. i too lost my dog a bullmastiff of 7 years to bone cancer, i cried so much my eyes were sore. People would say she's only a dog..but she was my baby. i grieved so hard even sniffing her blanket. I also dreamed of her......, there was a knock at my front door when i opened it she was sitting there on the drive with a little fawn pup next to her, the pup had a red bow and a luggage ticket that said Maisie, my dog reached out her paw to me and kissed my face, i stroked her head, then stroked the pups head, when i turned back my dog had gone but the pup was still there.....
So one week later i bought Maisie, to me she was a gift in my dream. I still grieve quite badly but the pain is getting easier and maisie keeps me on my toes !!
Best wishes Angie x

Thinking of you.
Louise.
XXXX

im sat hear crying for you,i cant make things right but i can tell that kassy was very much loved,she is still with you today,that little scratch you heard at the door or the odd bark that you still hear is kassy saying mum im still hear.she is now in doggy heaven well and fit again,so please remember the good times that you had,and im sure you will meet again. take care.veronica

thanks again to you all!! I found her collar in a cupboard the other day and cried again,but i now smile when i think of her,and i laugh because she used to fart when the mother-in -law sat next to her as she did not see eye-to eye with her and my mum in law hates dogs,kass knew!! i had another dream and she was sat with her head on my bed and licking my hand and i woke up crying,maybe she comes to visit when i sleep.i hope so!!

i should not read these post's i always cry....
no one understands the bond you have with your dogs, it is heart breaking letting them go, im sure..
i think i would crack up when my two have to go !!!
i had to put my hamster to sleep last new years eve...i cried for a whole week (sobbing) i too kept thinking of his little face as i held him when the vet gave him the injection taking his last breath of air..it doesn't matter how small or what animal it is, it is a life you have cared for scince they have been around...
i hope in time you wil be able to think of her with a great big smile,instead of greiving tears,remeber there is no time limit on this,don't ever think you are being daft crying for her
take care xxxxxxxxx

bless her soul xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx