In September we lost our best friend and companion - Colonel. She was a lovely chocolate Labrador of 14 - so good to us, so kind, so loving. In the last year or so her health had begun to fail. Most of her days were spent sleeping in the sun or in one of her favourite cosy spots. At the end of August when she went to stand up, she couldn't. We tried physiotherapy and hydrotherapy - and lots of prayers - but it was to no avail.

On the 12th I made the hardest decision of my life and called the vet. Colonel and I spent the day outside in the warm sunshine hugging and stroking. She slept in my lap a lot. In the late afternoon the vet arrived and I held Colonel in my lap until she had passed over the rainbow bridge. I hope that she can forgive me for what I have done.

Gently, little boat,
Across the waters float,
Their crystal waves dividing;
The sun in the west
Is going to rest:
Glide, glide, glide,
Towards the Islands of the Blest.

--- WH Auden

At night I get up to go find her but instead of her gentle snores there is only silence. I keep thinking that I'll look up and see her, but it is only a shadow of a memory. The house, like my heart, seems so empty now - and yet I also sense her presence all around me.

A light has gone out in our life, but a new one is alive in heaven. She is with her sisters now, running like a puppy, swimming for sticks and not worrying if she is eating too much. We miss her terribly and will never forget her.

Mark

Mark

My heart goes out to you. It will get easier and you did the right thing for your girl.

I lost my first ever Choccie girl, Mars last August, she was 14 3/4.

It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do but it I knew it was the last kindest thing I could have done for my little girl.

Take Care

Lucy
xx

Mark - Nothing I can say, I know.

take care, my thoughts are with you.

Sweep X

Lucy & Sweep:

Thanks you both for your thoughts. It becomes a little easier every day, but I think it will take a long time to heal. I came home today and, when I opened the door I could smell her. It was strangely comforting but also kind of sad.

My wife and I are going to plant something - probably a tree - for her in the garden. I would like to make it something that flowers in the late summer or maybe bears fruit at this time. Possibly an apple or crab apple. The other option is to make it shady and have a place to sit under it. There is a spot in the garden where 'Colonel' liked to snooze in the sun and we are thinking of that place.

Thanks again for your kind words, ----------- Mark

Mark,

I know there's nothing I can say to heal the pain.

You did the best thing by your girl. It's an awful decision to make.....but you couldn't see her suffer.

I think she'd be happy that you made that decision.

Love
Lisa

Thanks Lisa.

This place seems so empty right now. It is still difficult for me to talk about it.

In my heart I knew that the time was coming, but I could never believe that it was going to be today. It was always going to be the next day.

There are days when I think that I did the wrong thing; that she didn't want to go. But my sister (who also lost hers recently) says that dogs are stoic and don't show the pain. 'Colonel' was a fighter and wouldn't give up, but her body was failing and nothing could stop that.

I know now that she is happy and playful again. She can run and swim (which she loved), her sight is better and her hearing is good again. Best of all - she doesn't have to watch her weight! I just wish she could be here with us and have all that. I know thats just me being selfish, however.

Well, I don't mean to go on. Thanks very much for posting. Reading the other posts also helps, too. People say many supportive things, which I find helpful as well, even if they aren't directed at me.

----------- Mark

The tree is a lovely idea.

We have a lovely rose we planted last year in Mar's memory.We have had such lovely blooms all year. It has put a smile on my face everytime I looked at it !

Take care

Lucy

Hi Lucy:

Thanks for your post and also the e-mails. Your mob looks fantastic - you're so lucky.

I'll try to call Glenys today. There is another group (in Norhtants, I think) that I need to contact as well.

We went looking for trees, etc., last weekend and found one we liked. A tulip tree. It'll grow quite large and be nice and shady underneath. We image it then, with a place to sit in the shade and look out over the fields. Maybe we'll have someone else to share it with by then.

Also, I want to thank you for all your support. I went through a very difficult time and your comments were helpful. Thanks again. ----------- Mark

Good luck in your search for a new baby !

Lucy

so sorry for your loss